Friday, August 26, 2005

Out for a duck

Some fuckwit has shot a duck with a crossbow.

The duck has survived, but a crossbow bolt is sticking out of its side. I spotted the story on the ITV news at lunchtime. Were it not for the fact that the duck must be suffering some distress, I would have been more amused at their attempts to catch it, which appear to be luring it with breadcrumbs and gaining its trust sufficiently for them to attempt to grab it. They’re not having much success and expect it might take days before they can get close enough to the quacker.

When I was a kid growing up in South Africa, there was a TV programme called “Attie en Joos” about the adventures of two tramps (or ‘boemelaars’ as they would have been called, since the programme was in Afrikaans). I mention this because, being 6 or 7 at the time, I learned a naughty trick from the pair.

In order to catch dinner, they headed for the local park with a cardboard box, a stick, and a long piece of string – and of course some breadcrumbs. The method of catching a pigeon was quite simple. Prop the box up with the stick, tie the string to the stick and scatter breadcrumbs around the box and underneath it. When the pigeons start tucking into the breadcrumbs, invariably some will stray under the box. At that point, give the string a yank and you’ll have your bird.

My friends and I naturally gave it a go. Guess what. It works!

Perhaps the RSPCA could give Attie and Joos’s tried and tested method a go. What have they got to loose?

Of course, if this trick fools a bird-brain, they could also consider using it to catch the troglodyte who shot the duck.


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